The warm conversation between adolescents and the elderly…now made into the book
[Pusanilbo 2007. 02.15]
Is an honest talk between grandpa in seventies and a boy in seventeen possible? For grandpa, a boy may seem fussy. As for a boy, grandpa may seem fusty.
However, the real problem has always been the bias. That’s why the program turned out to be effective. The program was conducted by the Research Institute of Science for the Better Living of the Elderly. The whole result was compiled in the book called ‘사이버 가족 Cyber Family’. It is rather a compiling report of the past 10 years since the establishment of the institute.
The book doesn’t have one specific figure. It is a book without heroes. Instead of heroes, there are a number of pictures and talks. In the pictures, many elderly and children appear. They had an open talk, as if they were playing at a tug of war or three-legged race to overcome the generational gap.
“I want to raise my hand and ask the teacher a question, but I have no courage to do so as I’m not very good at studying. I don’t want to be seen, by my friends, as bothering the class. I know I have to do something to change my personality, but I simply can’t.”
“Why don’t you try raising your question loudly? The beginning is always difficult, but once you get used to it, you’ll be better at it.”
“Well, I understand raising a question is not easy. Why don’t you send an e-mail to your teacher? Your curiosity on something proves that you have interest in the study. Also, don’t underestimate your fine personality.”
These are the posted articles in the Chapter 2
The Chapter 7
“Studying is my biggest trouble. And I started to feel annoyed at nagging of my parents. I feel like I’m becoming an adolescent. I want to go out of my house. I don’t know if my parents are aware of this.”
“You feel probably bad about your parents since they don’t express their care but only nag you out. Then, imagine that you’re a father and what would you do with your children. Can you think of different ways to treat them? I think your parents are concerned about the fact that if you lose the time to study right now, you’ll have rare chance to do it again. That is because of the love of your parents to you.”
The grade and lose of self-confidence is the common topic for the adolescent. Therefore, the topic tends to be quite serious. However, it doesn’t mean that the talk also has to be weighed down. With a simple phrase of “I understand you,” the gate of the talk was opened. The Chapter 31
“I’ve studied early in the morning, but my grades don’t improve. What should I do?”
“I guess you feel quite a burden. I’ve seen some people who were weak in an actual test. However, the effort is never in vain as long as there’s a certain goal.”
“Hypnotize yourself. There are not always good things in the world. “Murphy’s law’ is much more powerful than ‘Sally’s law’. I’d like to tell you that if you can’t avoid it, then enjoy it.”
The talk doesn’t always need a special topic. There are some articles that share the remembrance and experiences in the Chapter 6
“I was surprised to hear that an azalea is edible. I tried some and the taste was sweet though a bit strange.”
“You haven’t tried an azalea until now? When I was a girl like you, I used to play with my friends a ‘flower game’ and ate an azalea so much that both of my lips became blue. We called an edible plant as a real flower and inedible as a dog flower.”
The talk goes beyond the national boundaries. In the Chapter 42
“Dear grandpa and grandma in Korea. I feel like we’re much closer through talking on the Internet. I can’t go to Korea often, but I’m really happy to meet our Cyber Family any time through the internet.”
Any tangled yarn can be raveled smoothly with time. The conversation was just like that. It was the exit to the blocked world without communication. Whenever the adolescents expressed their troubles and the elderly posted their answer. The answer was more like sympathy than an advice, but what was needed to overcome the generational gap was ‘not an advice, but sympathy’.
‘Cyber Family (www.wellageing.com) Program began back in 2004. It was designed to destroy the negative prejudice of the relationship between the adolescents and the elderly. Anyone can post their articles and answers, but six schools decided to ‘stay as a virtual member.’ These include Gamman and Manduk Middle School in Busan, Gohyun Middle school in Gyeongnam, Pogok Middle School in Gyeonggi, Hwasan Middle School in Jeonnam, Japan Osaka Keonguk Middle School and the Busan branch of the National Health Insurance Corporation. They had an off-line festival when they first met face to face beyond the internet. The clue of the conversation was closer than our thoughts.
Hyunchoong Paek choong@busanilbo.com
